Cloud of smoke.

I am living in a cloud of smoke.

Literally and metaphorically. Wierd. Isn't it?

San Bernardino (where I work) is covered in smoke. The smoke is coming down from the mountain and we are sitting in a big cloud of smoke. There is not even a breeze here, so the smoke is just sitting here. It's hard to breathe, my eyes are burning, my skin is drying. My head is hurting so bad.

They finally told us that we could go home if the smoke is getting to us. I most likely will be after I finish writing out my project report. I am getting dizzy each time I try to move my head.

My life feels like I'm immersed in a cloud of smoke.

I thought I was so sure in my decision. I thought it was finally the right thing to do. But I was wrong. I was so wrong and I would do anything to take it all back and to just be the way it was before.

But God has reasons as to why He puts these things in life. It was my conscious decision, but I know that my life is in His hands.. so.. I must have been steered to do this for a reason.

If I was meant to have him in my life, the God will find a way to bring him back. If God says that we have gone as far as we could, then I must accept what I have decided.

I can't change what I had done. I can't take it back and not expect the repercussions.

If I could take it back.. I know better what to do with it when I get it back..

It's never going to be perfect.. but I would like it to be Christ-centered.

A relationship thrives based off of love, communication and God. If those three very important aspects are there, then anything can happen. That's what I want... with whoever God decides I should share that with..

I offer it up to the Lord..