Motion sickness

These past few months of my life have been an absolute rollercoaster.

If I had finally let it all get to me, I think I would have driven myself absolutely INSANE.

I think I have been doing a pretty good job distancing myself from most of it. A good safe distance to avoid getting sucked in the void that I usually get sucked into.

With all the twists and turns.. I can still say to people that I'm happy. I can still tell people that life has been nothing but ups.. and that's only because I have been ignoring the downs..

I think God likes to mess with me. I think He likes to mess with all of us. It's his way of amusing Himself. And I'm not saying all of this in a bad way, oh no.

I think He likes to do this to us to show us that we are stronger than we think we are. He does this to make sure that we don't think that we don't need Him anymore. He does this to remind us that He is in our lives, that He is always here to help us when we need it. But also, that we can get through anything, especially with His help.

I can't hate anymore. I am incapable of hating anything in my life. Knowing that everything I have and everything I experience is God-given.. I can't hate. I can't sit here and say "I hate my life..'

That's like saying "I hate God and what He's given me."

I just can't do that. I don't hate God. I love all that He has given me. All the ups and the downs, all blessings, all gifts.

But I can't help but feel a little motion sickness through these twists and turns..

So if I have one request to God.. it would be to.. soften the ride.. just a little..