Keep on walking..

I made a personal declaration to myself to not give up on my life.

I just don't know how to stop feeling like I already have.

Life isn't fair. Everyone seems to have the life that I have always wanted. Yet they seem to be the farthest from God and any form of religion. They are "spiritual" rather than "religious" believing in the "higher power" but not practicing any faith..

Yet.. they are married.. some have kids.. and kids on the way..

That's what I want.. why can't I have that and practice my faith too?

Others do it.. why can't i?

I know that the answers are out there.. I have to stop sulking about my life and just go look for those answers..

But where? Where do i start?

What if the answers have been in front of me the whole time? What if it's right there under my nose? What if I'm missing the answers completely?

What if I never find it.. NO! I refuse to believe that I will never figure out the meaning of my life.. I refuse to believe that I will never find the answers..

Everything will be revealed to me in time.. slowly.. I just need to be patient..

Patience.. oh Lord.. help me!!