A little "mind venting"

I wrote this on my myspace blog.. and I thought that I'd share it here.. it's just a little venting I need to do about myself.. and beign true to who I really am.. whether or not it puts me in a bad light.. I just thought.. I'd share...

Perfection.. rather.. lack thereof..
I'm not perfect.. have I ever claimed to be?

I know my faults.. I can be snobby.. I can be bitchy.. I can be spoiled..

I'm a princess.. in the worst possible way.. I know that.. I know what I'm capable of being..

I know what kind of high-hat.. "my way or the highway"... type of person I can be.. and there are many times that I am like that..

I am the worst type of person if you catch me in the wrong mood.. and i'm not a force to be reckoned with if i don't like what you are doing..

In a few simple words.. I AM A SPOILED BRAT..

Yes.. I realize this.. yes.. I know this..

Do I want to change? Well.. yes.. and no..

I do know the repercussions of this personality flaw.. yet.. in some cases.. it's gotten me to where I am today.. I've gotten many things in life because I did them MY WAY.. and rejected any other way.. because of this "flaw".. I became a relatively strong person...

But I also know that because of this.. I can turn many people away.. and in fact I have.. I could easily not blame myself.. saying that.. "it's their fault for not being able to handle me" but did I even make myself able to be handled? Probably not..

Yes.. I'm a brat..

But beyond that.. I do have a heart.. and there are a select few people in my life that do realize that.. I am a nice person.. for the most part.. I am a genuine caring person.. I love with all my heart.. and I give as much as I can as often as I can..

You cant' deny that.. I can't deny that..

I can't say that I'm going to get rid of my "bratty side" because.. maybe I don't want to fully get rid of it.. it adds to my "fiesty-ness"..

I can't say that I'm going to let it take over my life.. or I'll be a very lonely individual..

It's finding the right balance.. and knowing when to use the brat in me.. knowing when it's appropriate.. and when it's time to just shut up and let things be..

It's who I am.. and I can't deny who I am.. I have to be true to myself.. good and bad.. I just need better control over it..

So there you have it.. that's who I am.. and that's who I'll always be.. the yin and the yang.. the good and the bad.. the up and the down.. the light and the dark.. it's inescapable.. everything needs it's pair..