Actions speak louder than words..

Comfort.. that's new..

I guess.. I have to adjust..

So.. I had reached this point in relationships before.. I mean.. you spend four years with someone.. you have no choice but to get comfortable..

But with my ex.. it was a different comfort..

With justyn.. it's a different comfort as well..

With me ex.. the comfort was knowing that we had each other.. all the time.. "had" as in.. someone to always make out with.. someone to always be there... for those instances that you "wanted" them there.. and in his case.. even when I didn't want him there.. in "that" way.. you know.. what i mean...

With Justyn.. it's a comfort in knowing that we can actually sit on the couch.. and watch tv.. and really WATCH tv.. or really WATCH a movie.. comfort in know that we don't have to say a thing to each otehr in the car.. but simply hold each others hand while driving.. and know that im completely safe.. we don't have to talk.. we dont' have to be on each other all the time.. and yet.. i know he still loves me.. and still wants me.. when the time is right..

It's that kinda comfort..

And it's exactly that kind of comfort I had always looked for in every relationship.. and now that I have it.. I'm not used to it.. and it tends to worry me..

It's comfort.. and it's not a bad change.. but it sometimes makes me think that he's losing interest in me.. or in the relationship.. but deep in my soul.. i know that's not the case.. and i have to stop thinking of a relationship as a "beck and call" sexual thing.. I know that in a healthy relationship.. there are just simple quiet moments.. and that those simple quiet moments doesn't mean that he doesn't want me anymore.. or that he's losing interest..

It's those simple quiet moments that we share in which we just enjoy each other's company.. and taht's just as good as making out.. and less energy consuming..

I'm not used to comfort in this manner.. but i do enjoy it.. when i let myself go and stop freaking out about it..