WAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

I need help... i really need help.. i'm feeling so blah today.. so... lethargic.. so apathetic.. i don't wanna be here.. and i'm at work.. and it's only 9:30... only 9:30!! My gawd.. can the time move any slower!!! Geez.. i wanna shoot myself.. i really wanna shoot myself.. and just end all this misery..

I feel overwhelmed.. like i can't handle it all.. like there are soo many things piled up against me and i can't handle it all.. i just don't understand.. i don't get it.. everything was going my way at one point... and now i feel like everything has piled up onto my shoulders and i'm having a hard time dealing with it all.. and what sucks is that i feel like i'm the only one dealing with it.. like i can't share it with anyone... no one else understands what i'm going through..

Everyone sees me as this happy peppy person.. with no problems.. no issues.. no nothing.. i'm happy.. i'm peppy.. i'm always up for a good time.. no one knows that i suffer inside.. that i cna't deal with the outside world.. that i'm hap=ving issues dealing with my own life.. that i just want to end my life to put me out of my misery.. and so that i can just be free of all these burdens...

I want to share these burdens with someone.. i want someone to understand my problems... i want someone to tell me that it's all gonna be okay.. there are worse things in this world.. that i can deal with it.. that they'd help me deal with it... why don't i have that.. why can't i have that... i'm killing myself here.. i wanna die.. i wanna just end all the issues.. all the burdens.. all the stuff.. just live my life free of all the issues...