The longest...

This is the longest I have gone without a pediucure! I know.. it's totally random.. but it just goes to show you the lack of time i have and the fact that i really want to save money. That is amazing.

I feel so bad for Justyn. But at the same time, it's what he needs. It;s the way life is gonna be. He's out gettin the money. I'm dealing with family stuff. He wants to go with us to my mothers birthday dinner. But he's working. I'm sorry for him. I want him to be there. I miss him when he's not around. It's wierd. I don't usually miss the guys i'm with but i miss him.

Everything seems different with him. I miss him when he's not here. He's the only one that has given me the butterflies in my stomach when ever we kiss or whenever he holds me. Just thinking about him sometimes gives me those butterflies. It used to happen a lot more in the beginning but it still happens somtimes. I see my future in his eyes. I see with him growing old. I see us taking care of a family. I see us. That has not happened before. I forced it to happen with some guys because I thought that they were my only shot at marriage and family life. I was wrong.. thank the Lord.. i was wrong!

Anyway.. i need a pedicure.. pronto!